Full Disclosure
"So they hid from the LORD God among the trees." Genesis 3:8b
When you read this passage, don't you want to laugh a little? It really is ridiculous . . . hiding from God. Duh, he knows EVERYTHING!
Yet, I do this all the time. I don't literally hide, but I choose not to disclose things to God all the time. I choose not to talk to him about things, afraid I'm going to jinx something . . . how ridiculous is that? He knows my thoughts, whether I'm "telling" them to him or not.
I think the things I'm most afraid to "tell" him are the things that shine negatively on my Christianity - you know, things like doubt, anger, questioning him etc. I shove all those things down because I don't want to admit that they are there. Thoughts enter my head like, "A good Christian wouldn't be doubting . . . a good Christian wouldn't question God . . . a good Christian wouldn't be angry". Those thoughts obviously aren't from God. They're from the deceiver.
I know that just the opposite is true. Doubting God, questioning God, even being angry with God can be a good thing, dare I say, a healthy thing? The trick, however, is full-disclosure. I need to have the courage to share my misgivings with him. I need to be completely honest with my struggles and my questions. Doing so . . . wrestling with them . . . has the power to actually strengthen my relationship with him.
I hope 2009 can be a year of "full disclosure" not a year of hiding.
I must say, right now is a low time of life for me. I have a LOT of questions and a LOT of doubts, and, quite frankly, a LOT of anger. God can be very confusing sometimes. However, instead of letting those things eat away at me, or allowing them to take root and grow bitterness, I'm going to choose to keep God in the loop. I'm going to take him at his word. His word says that he has unfailing love for me, and that his grace is sufficient to cover my sins and my doubts. I need to echo the psalmists that fully disclosed their feelings of abandonment, fear, anger . . . yet chose to remember God's faithfulness to them.
Everything in me right now, wants to hide . . . to run away . . . to abandon the God that seems to have abandoned me. But, instead, I will choose to trust . . . I will choose full disclosure . . . I will choose to keep him in the loop, trusting that my faith will be strengthen through it.
When you read this passage, don't you want to laugh a little? It really is ridiculous . . . hiding from God. Duh, he knows EVERYTHING!
Yet, I do this all the time. I don't literally hide, but I choose not to disclose things to God all the time. I choose not to talk to him about things, afraid I'm going to jinx something . . . how ridiculous is that? He knows my thoughts, whether I'm "telling" them to him or not.
I think the things I'm most afraid to "tell" him are the things that shine negatively on my Christianity - you know, things like doubt, anger, questioning him etc. I shove all those things down because I don't want to admit that they are there. Thoughts enter my head like, "A good Christian wouldn't be doubting . . . a good Christian wouldn't question God . . . a good Christian wouldn't be angry". Those thoughts obviously aren't from God. They're from the deceiver.
I know that just the opposite is true. Doubting God, questioning God, even being angry with God can be a good thing, dare I say, a healthy thing? The trick, however, is full-disclosure. I need to have the courage to share my misgivings with him. I need to be completely honest with my struggles and my questions. Doing so . . . wrestling with them . . . has the power to actually strengthen my relationship with him.
I hope 2009 can be a year of "full disclosure" not a year of hiding.
I must say, right now is a low time of life for me. I have a LOT of questions and a LOT of doubts, and, quite frankly, a LOT of anger. God can be very confusing sometimes. However, instead of letting those things eat away at me, or allowing them to take root and grow bitterness, I'm going to choose to keep God in the loop. I'm going to take him at his word. His word says that he has unfailing love for me, and that his grace is sufficient to cover my sins and my doubts. I need to echo the psalmists that fully disclosed their feelings of abandonment, fear, anger . . . yet chose to remember God's faithfulness to them.
Everything in me right now, wants to hide . . . to run away . . . to abandon the God that seems to have abandoned me. But, instead, I will choose to trust . . . I will choose full disclosure . . . I will choose to keep him in the loop, trusting that my faith will be strengthen through it.
