YouVersion

All day long I have thought that there is no state of being in which my abilities are a disability to God. All day long I have thought that God the Father is so good in his very essence. He is so good that he shares with me and makes me a beneficiary of his greatness. I have learned in this depraved, dark, mean, lonely, drought-like internal world that the more depraved, darker, meaner, lonelier, and drought like it gets the more this same God reveals his greatness in a more magnificent capacity. This capacity is indulged and bloated with compassion so unique and so perfect that the human mind is unable to burst it. The sight of such greatness makes the human mind thirst, pant, and long for a drink of what the greatness beholds. The sight is irresistible. The sight is irresistible to the confessing sinner. Confess: to repent and/or render glory to whom it is required.. The hymnist, Joseph Hart, once wrote: “Come, ye weary, heavy-laden, Lost and ruined by the fall; If you tarry till you’re better, You will never come at all.”
All day long I have given thanks with a peaceful spirit to the God who laid down his life for my sin. Because he laid down his life for my sin, I am allowed to enter his throne room with boldness. All day long I have reflected on the tendencies of all the days of my youth. I saw a broken, confused, and defiant young girl who deepened the wounds by running on them. Yet in the midst of self-inflicted suffering the High and Lifted up God came to my lowly and infidel body. I submitted myself to him because I found a cycle of my past running lap after lap after lap. And did it ever end? I didn’t know but I knew that I was hurting and that the only one who understood me is the Son of God who died for my misunderstanding of the present state of mind and lack of understanding of him. He was and is a place of refuge and the only place to find the truth. I believed that and knew it too. So I told him my fears and needs. I asked him to help me understand my internal battles that manifested in external actions of fear.
All day long I have meditated on the painful beauty of the cross because it is the answer within the answer to my supplication. The answer of my supplication is the very power and human-understood ability of God the Father’s transcendence upon my broken spirit. The answer is simple: God is God. He bought me, and the rest of the body of Christ, with blood that is not our own, his blood.
Because his blood covers me, I am addicted to the continual greatness of the God that I am sure exists. I am addicted to testifying that my testimony is the same as that of the God who gave up his son’s life in a way that no one would/could/ or will ever be able to do. I Chronicles 16:8, “Give thanks to the Lord! Call on his name! Make known his accomplishments among the nations!”