Luke wrote about me
First of all, I want to thank God for bringing life into me through this revelation. True life.
I will start by telling a short story about my life, so you would understand where I'm coming from...
I am a believer in Jesus Christ since childhood. My parents are Christian and they raised me with these beliefs. I dedicated myself to God when I was still young, and I never walked away from my commitment. I served God wholeheartedly my whole life. Throughout this time, a sense of emptiness was creeping into my heart. I sought different ways to fill it. At 24 years of age, I noticed a new feeling taking root in my heart. Bitterness. No matter where I went or what I did, this feeling grew. Bitterness. It was taking over my life. I was turning into a mad old woman...After all these years of serving God, I felt like a drum, looking good on the outside, making loud music, keeping everyone in tact...but so empty on the inside. I had no passion, no joy, no peace...just going through the motions.
Reading the story about the prodigal son, I realized, Luke was writing about me! I was the older brother!
(Luke 15:25-31 MSG)
"All this time his older son was out in the field. When the day's work was done he came in. As he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing. Calling over one of the houseboys, he asked what was going on. He told him, 'Your brother came home. Your father has ordered a feast—barbecued beef!—because he has him home safe and sound.' The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen. The son said, 'Look how many years I've stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends? Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast!' His father said, 'Son, you don't understand. You're with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he's alive! He was lost, and he's found!'"
I recognized myself so clearly in the older brother. Why, I was serving faithfully all these years and I didn't get any type of reward. Noone ever threw me a party. I didn't have any special feelings of Gods presence, no supernatural revelations...I didn't get "high" in the spirit, as many newcomers to Christ talk about it. I moved by faith, not by sight. This whole time, I was so jealous of all those people. I thought, why do they get all this special treatment from God when they wasted so much of their life, but me, the one who was faithful, gets nothing? But through this story, God showed me that He does care about me. It's me who doesn't understand how blessed I am and that I can have everything I want. The only thing is, I have to be the one to go and get it. I have to throw myself a party. I am the one who needs to search through the pantry (the bible) and find something delicious to feast on. It's all available to me, so why don't I use it?
Application: I'm digging deep. This is my time and I'm gonna throw myself a party. I will enjoy Gods presence as never before and find all sorts of delicacies that he prepared for his precious daughter...
Created about 1 year ago
