LONG NOTE: CG,RW (part 1)

Long title: "Correct Gently, Remember Why (part 1)"

One To One day 25 shows how to deal with worldly opponents, especially those with different persuasions (persuasions which will be irrational at best, and downright abhorrent at worst). if it ever descends into an attempt to win an argument to be shown to be right, then we are missing the point ourselves at that stage (so how people in the dark are meant to get the point then is anyone's guess). My mentor (who did most to bring about an interest in spiritual matters during the 1-2 years before i was saved) was an esteemed manager in the workplace (for being good at his job + a decent person, i aspired to become like him one day, but i was very far from it at the time), he asserted authority when necessary (with a "light touch on the driving wheel" manner, not a "sledgehammer to crack a nut" approach), but he was also a teacher, encourager to be the best you could be, and you felt able to tell him (not cover up) if you made mistakes, that way someone (often him) could rescue the situation. He did not preach much at all (except, crucially, before he left, i asked him "why are you so positive thinking" and he quite plainly said "i am a Christian, i belive in Jesus Christ" and not a lot else then, because time was limited, the lift home he gave me was on his way home but also "above & beyond the call of duty", and the fact that he had a family hinterland so did not want to mix business with leisure was another reason to admire him as a mentor. plus, i think he was aware that at that time i had a sort of "all religions are bad" prejudice). It wasnt the answer i had been expecting (i don't know what sort of answer i had been expecting, but it was not "i'm a Christian, i believe in Jesus Christ", that shocked me). He left within a month of that chat (with one of the best supported whip-rounds for a leaving present ever seen in the workplace, a whip-round that people of other departments wanted to contribute to in addition to his own department - he had earned serious respect among many in that workplace) and i felt bereft. And i wondered about what my mentor had said - to be honest, my first reaction was "is that a joke, or a way of getting back at me by doing my head in?" (revenge for various times i had been a "less than ideal employee" - he had put me on the start of the disciplinary process, and i knew he had been right to do so for the sake of the whole department, company & customers, but i had also been encouraged to perform better, learn more, grow up). But he wasn't a frivolous or nasty person, he was an admirable, positive mentor, that initial suspicion said more about my cynical attitude to religion than about him. It bugged me. I couldn't avoid the conclusion that my mentor was being serious, was more kindly disposed to me than i deserved, and he would gain nothing from doing my head in. I had to admit "he practices what they preach" (because he had "walked the talk", while doing a challenging secular job where you did not get paid for walking the talk, the company was about profit primarily, although it provided a practical service that was not incompatible with Christianity. I learned the meaning of "leadership is a service" from him, then could relate that to "The Servant King" when i first heard that hymn shortly after getting saved). After about 2 weeks working without my mentor, i quit the job, so it was a combination of courage + "i have to make a fresh start with my life, i have nothing to lose" desperation + "i must take a fresh look at this Christianity thing" curiosity, that combination prompted me to set foot in a church. That was after 12 years of avoiding churches like the plague, apart from a short visit to a church earlier that year (when i had been terrified by how friendly people were, i had shameful secrets to hide, didnt want friendly people asking me questions, i might end up telling them). I was 28, had spent the years 5-16 being forced to go to catholic church and religious school, never "getting" what religion was about and finding it frightening, condemning & confusing, deciding i was an atheist when i was 10, going through the motions of rituals to avoid being expelled from school, miming during hymns, going to latin mass (tolerable because i didn't understand latin, so you could daydream, and listen to more music than at english language masses). i had even passed Religious Education exams at school, but had looked at the Bible THEN as "well it's a bit like Mickey Mouse & Shakespeare, you don't have to believe Shakespeare to pass English Literature exams" (some worldly people really do think that way when they are in the dark). At 16 i dropped out of school and stopped all pretense at religious observance (can't call it dropping out because i had never been in, my body may have been on a pew/behind a desk, but my mind had been elsewhere, daydreaming cloud-cuckooland usually). I got into a series of fortune-telling, occult, new-age spiritual counterfeit rubbish, from about 13-14, would move from one "new age" thing to another, found them all inadequate, but they also stuck in my head obsessively with a "but what if it's true" fearfulness, and despite seeing various contradictions, i thoroughly confused myself with others, of which new age philosophy is choc-a-bloc full. At about 26 I started part-time day release education in a practical vocational subject. At about 26-27 i bought a cheap paperback Complete Works Of Shakespeare and spent a year reading most of it. I also bought & read a "History of The Jews" tome, despite not being Jewish, i was curious about Israel & Jewish people, i liked/admired a numer of Jewish people, both famous ones and people i met in everyday life. Was amazed to find that history & archaeology proved that Abraham, Moses, David, Esther, had been real people. At 27-28 i found books being thrown out in a builder's skip - took about 10, wanted to leave The Bible, but i thought as a joke "you got the complete Shakespeare, so you have to have the Bible too" (a long running BBC radio show in UK used to ask a different celebrity each week what 8 records they would take to a permanent exile alone on a desert island, then gives them The Bible, the Complete Shakespeare, and their choice of 3rd book and luxury item). I took the Bible home. Struggled with the King James Version language during occasional random peeks in it (this was during the time of Gorbachov in Russia, in England i saw a BBC TV news item on Russian tanks being converted into tractors, someone said "its like swords being beaten into ploughshares in the Bible" and i wanted to find that, but did not know my way around the Bible, and was more concerned with worldly study & ambition then). I did think "maybe its better to act the Bible than just sit & read quietly, like its better to act Shakespeare or go see a live play". I got into the book of Esther just before the TianAnMen Square demos in China, then was freaked out when a newspaper astrologer qouted the "raised up for times like these" verse in his predictions for a few star signs (i have since repented of, and been forgiven, the sin of having been into astrology. Read Isaiah chapters 44 to 47 and Psalm 139 if that is an issue for you). In 1989, within a week after the fall of the Berlin Wall, i slunk into the back of a Baptist church in England (hoping i would not meet any friendly people who would scare me). A Zimbabwean lady spoke to the congregation for about 5 minutes about how she came to London to pursue a career in nursing, and Jesus had been indispensible in her life, then she spent about 1 to 2 hours explaining who Jesus is, why he "took the rap for us" on the cross, she explained the atonement, redemption, divine love is more than human love, the creator's ability to resurrect if he can create, there was no alternative to the cross, divine justice, God's higher wisdom, re-conciliation, salvation by grace not works, eternal salvation, election being God's initiative because humans are not clever enough to work it out ourselves so it must be revealed, what sin is, we have all sinned so all need to repent and make a totally fresh start, and being "born again" means giving your life in 100% surrender to Jesus who alone is a victor you can trust to be merciful. She explained that above all, the gospel is about mercy as well as justice. Jesus came to save not condemn, the offer of salvation is like an amnesty God offers to defeated former enemies, but we have to stop being God's enemies and start to serve him as Lord, because we have to serve someone, the choice is, not "if" but "who" we serve. Love is primarily service, not a feeling. That human enemies are not "the real enemy", the devil is. And we can't fight the devil & our sinfulness on our own without surrendering totally to God and letting God own us completely, then God providing us with the new life we need by living in us. That Christian life is not easy, it usually gets harder, but we can overcome. The gospel wasn't invented, because finite and sinful humans are simply not capable of inventing what is infinite and sinless, only an infinite and perfect creator can create and be that, we are not big enough even collectively. But imperfect as we are, God still loves us, not because he needs us, but in his higher wisdom he chooses to love us. He accepts us to come to him as we are, but we know we need improvement and he is able to make us better than we were. She explained that the devil was defeated once and for all time at the cross, but the devil lies to himself and to anyone who wants to belive the lie that that victory didn't happen. But the victory has happened, the truth will out, and now life is a bit like a cleaning up of the battleground, a chance to join God's side before its too late. So which side are you on?
The Zimbabwean nurse explained the gospel, and i understood it for the first time in my life, i knew i needed salvation, so as Jesus had "taken the rap for me", i wasn't going to waste that and miss the chance to get what i needed most - truth, forgiveness, and a life-giving relationship with Jesus. Nothing can compete with that. I accepted Jesus as Saviour and Lord, made my unconditional surrender to him and gained a new and lasting life.
Born again.
I had discovered my mentor's mentor, so did not worry about losing an esteemed work boss when i could have Jesus as mentor and boss for my whole life (so Jesus became greater, and the mentor who had pointed to him so faithfully became less, like John the Baptist had done in the Bible). I was helped to pray by a German lady (who advised me to count the cost, then only decide if i was sure). I decided to be born again that evening, with the help of 2 people who might once have seen me (a British person) as "the enemy", if they had not been Christians & able to forgive. It was less than a week after the Berlin Wall fell, the Russians, others in the Soviet Union & East Europeans, whom we in the West had been brought up to fear (if not hate), were no longer enemies - official. My former wall of hostility against God & Christians became "history" to me, in the same way as the Berlin Wall became "history" to the world. Jesus broke down my wall (read Ephesians chapter 2), it's fortunate for me that i don't want to return to how things were, because going back is just not possible. And i discovered peace - i acquired a new peace of mind (i don't remember ever having very much of it before, but occult/new-age lies definately stole what little i had during the time before i knew about my salvation). The glory goes 100% to Jesus, without him none of us can do anything.
I have had a lot to learn since then, the need to do so goes on right up to the grave for all of us. Among the most helpful things have been learning to count my blessings (given examples of certain Christians who have had much less worldly resources than i have had) or the question "do you know how much you have been forgiven?" and the scripture "i know WHOM i have believed, and that HE is able ..." (read 2Timothy 1:12) . That Jesus is "the way the truth and the life". And the good shepherd (it made me happy to think of baptism as being like a 'sheep dip', the shepherd knows when its right for the sheep, and if need be will prod a sheep into the dip with a curly stick if the sheep is unduly fearful & doesnt realise how necessary that bath is). I got baptized 1.5 yrs later. Having found Jesus to be also Light of the World. Key of David. Author & perfecter of our faith. Teacher, Healer, Merciful victor. Saviour & Lord. King of kings & Lord of lords. Advocate. Alpha &Omega. The positive answer.
He has given me so much! All that's left for me to ask is "give me all the right queations" because he has done all we need, knows what we need, will supply all we need, in fact IS all we need. We learn when we get saved that we did not have all the answers on our own, but not surprising when we didn't even have the right questions then! We are extremely fortunate if we can ask the right questions now, some will have to wait until the other side of the grave, but something tells me eternity will not be dull, and we get to meet the main man face to face. So until then, we can trust what he asks of us to be right, trust him to plan suitable lessons for everyone, and the questions to & from others we need to teach & learn from on the way. But we find all the right answers in him, and more than that, that HE IS the answer at the end, so the how & why, and who what where & when that lead people to him are among our best friends. Maybe we just have to learn how to appreciate, what questions are urgent and what questions can wait. We need to learn how to help others want to try, to ask their own right questions in all our lives, lead them to ask the right questions to the only one who can make them all worthwhile. serving how we have been served. Learning them all the things we have learned, all the time knowing we on our own do not always work out everything right, we need revelation, we need to receive him & his light. Behold he stands and he knocks. He is outside, he's come saught out us, did we know we were lost, were/are we shocked? Or just surprised? We are the ones who need him, to please please give us, all the right questions plse. We can trust him to give everyone the right answers, we can trust him to give us time and even the right times of silence. We can trust him to set the pace, and to give us rest, not to make the tests we face too hard for us, only testing us on questions where he knows he has given us the answers already. He has given us all we have needed time and again before, and he gives what we need now, and one day will give us rest and all the rest. He even knows what we need before we ask. him. All i can ask of him is please, please give me all the right questions, and enough sense to know i need to look for the right answers in you, give me enough sense to listen to you too, so give me enough sense to shut up, so give me all the right questions, not too many, just enough. You always have done. I know i can trust you, and why i will always be able to, i do know just not what to trust but who. Give me the questions that lead to you, and the ones you've already asked that are written in your book, if we know where to look, the only book that's essential to get us through, the only book we need to get the message through to others too. Thank you - I know you will do.

Created 9 months ago