trust.
i will trust in the lord in everything i do. i always did, but lately ive been feeling really lonely. yano, single at sixteen. for me, its weird. i dont know who im gonna be with forever. i know, that the lord is all i need. and i feel that- without everything i could do nothing, but with nothing but the lord i can do everything. but im lonely. i crave love. those sweet little texts or cuddles and kisses when you dont expect them. lying together on the grass on a sunny day.. i miss it. and i know that god will deliver the guy im supposed to be with.
lord, please. i trust in you fully to deliver the one that you have had planned for me forever. i believe that you only want to make me happy and you want me to wait until im happy with myself in my own skin. i undrstand that you love me and i know that you always will. i thank you lord for my family, my friends, the sunshine. i pray that my friend claire will be saved lord. she's been through some hardships but she's your gorgeous daughter too and she needs her daddy- you lord. i thank you so much that you are my papa. you're so amazing and i thank you for all your glorious creations. this earth is glorious in the sunshine. ive never felt so beautiful as i do right now, i know i am perfect in the way that you've made me. lord i pray for katie. help her eat help her beat the disease that gripped me. help her trust in you that she too is gorgeous and perfect the way you made her. lord i pray for my baptism. i pray that my mum will be proud and that she might open her heart to you lord. jesus save her. i know you can. i pray that my dad will be there. i know he doesnt want to be but lord open his mind just enough to let him see who i've become. i pray that you save him. i pray that my brother learns from my example and that he'd stop swearing and blaspheming just because he thinks its cool. i pray you open his heart enough to want to come to my baptism. i pray that you save him. lord im so sorry for the things i do wrong. when i want to scream and shout at people, when i accidentally cuss when im mad, when i think impure thoughts. im so sorry. lord i thank you so much for molly and becky. they're gorgeous and amazing. i thank you for my small group and i pray that you help me to fully understand and have reverance with the things i'll learn tonight. your name is holy and amazing and i will always love you, my creater, my saviour, my lord, my father, for all my life and all eternity with you in heaven. amen.
wow. reading this note that I wrote years ago has reminded me of gods glory. I prayed to find the man I was supposed to be with, because I was so lonely. and now I've been with the most amazing guy on the planet for 21 months, nearly 2 years. he loves me so deeply and he is so kind and respectful to me, but most importantly he loves god- we knew each other and dated about 5 years ago and he was lovely then. but I had an eating disorder and I didn't know god- I broke up with him because I couldn't make someone else happy if I was unhappy myself. years past and literally 2 months after my baptism we were thrown together on the same team for our churches mission week. turning round and seeing him behind me I heard god say 'here he is'. I knew he was the one. and I was so happy in myself anyway, happy with my body and more importantly, healthy. and everything happened from there. we'll celebrate 2 years together soon and we know we want to be together forever and get married. so thank you lord, because you are love and you deliver our soul mates to us with your perfect timing. xxxxx
Created almost 3 years ago
