By Faith You're Healed
September was an extremely difficult month for me-maybe one of the toughest of my life. Don't get me wrong, I know that it could have been much worse and looking back most of the issues I faced were brought upon myself. For too long I've always tried to do things my way and when I faced adversity I always wanted to handle it and fix it myself.
I've always had Faith and especially in the tough times I've always brought them before God in prayer. Here's the thing though-I bring it before God but I don't leave it there! I leave the throne room clutching on to whatever it is like it's still mine to deal with, hoping that God will run after me and snatch it from me. In the past 4 weeks of my life, if anything, God has been teaching me to lay it down and walk away. Isn't this what Faith is supposed to be?
Bottling all the "stuff" in my life finally caught up with me and it exploded like Champagne in the winning team's locker room. I started having anxiety attacks which led to some health problems-both were things I've never faced before. I thought I was too strong to let stress catch up with me and I definitely have been taking my health for granted. There were nights when I thought my body was just shutting down on me. I kept praying: "God, you've been calling me to do so much, why are you letting this happen to me?!"
To try and make a long story short I'm turning the corner. God has been teaching me through this entire ordeal-He didn't make it happen obviously but I believe I actually felt Him holding my hand through it. He brought me to several scriptures the past 4 weeks about being stubborn, worrying, being anxious-words I needed to read for sure! But the scripture of the woman who had so much faith in Jesus that she believed 'if I just touch His garment I'll be healed'-for some reason that stuck with me. I questioned how strong my faith really was. I've always talked the big talk-I even have tattoos that show what a "soldier" in the Spiritual War I am! But in September the enemy turned me into a weakling-spiritually and physically-and this verse helped me start working my way back to the Front Lines. I'm not there yet but God continues to teach me and heal me and I praise His Holy name and I thank Him for the cross-for Jesus!!
I pray that I grow in my Faith and I stop taking my health and my calling for granted. I pray that I let go of all the stress and roadblocks in my life and lay it down at the feet of Jesus. I pray that I stop looking for miraculous signs like lightning bolts and shooting stars to give me hope and that I can have the Faith of the woman who needed only to touch the garment of Jesus. Don't just talk it, you have to walk it.
Created over 2 years ago
